AT THE MOVIES

FOOLS' PARADISE

With Brigadier General Sir Crispin Maddingley-Snorrt, K.B. (Retired)

Sir Crispin's reviews come to us from Upper Rogering, Surrey, England

This week, the Brigadier General introduces an insider's view of the making of this summer's blockbuster movie, "The Patriot"

If there is one thing I'm dashed glad about, as an Englishman, it's the fact that certain historical events, though doubtless unpleasant at the time, allowed us to shuffle off the burden of those tiresome transatlantics. It should have been apparent to the meanest intelligence that a nation that let you know it was peeved by pouring perfectly good tea into the harbor was on a course that would culminate in what I believe they call "gangsta' rap," while the fact that they thought such childishness was funny foreshadowed the dreary horror of "Saturday Night Live." Had I been around at the time, I would have greeted the news that the colonials were revolting with a rousing "So, what's new?" and argued strongly for throwing them the keys to the whole damned continent and telling them to "Have a nice day!"
  I wasn't around at the time, of course, and that's why we have a movie like "The Patriot." I confess I expected a pretty ghastly spectacle, but I was not prepared for the astonishing performance of a newcomer to

the screen, Gavin Sinclair, who plays the pivotal role of Valet Number 2 and single-handedly rescues the entire movie. Come Oscar time, the members of the Academy will want to make sure they don't overlook Mr. Sinclair, a brilliant and generous man, who is not above buying a chap three double Glenfiddichs in The Badger and Feathers and standing him and his old pals Reggie and Squiffer a curry and a few pints of lager at the Star of Bengal on the High Street after closing time.
  It was just after Squiffer had fallen asleep with his head in a bowl of bismati rice and I was idly picking pieces of papadum out of his hair that I had the brilliant idea of asking this Sinclair chappie to give us an insider's view of the making of the movie. He was good enough to agree and we are now able to bring you….. 

THE MAKING OF
THE PATRIOT

DIRECTED BY
ROLAND EMMERICH

AND
STARRING

Previous Issues
Issue 1 Feb 2000
Issue 2 March 2000
Issue 3 May 2000
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MEL GIBSON

GAVIN SINCLAIR

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Want to read a real movie review instead of this rubbish?
Get info about "The Patriot" and other movies from Lawrence Toppman of the Charlotte Observer.